Today I am celebrating the first half of my life by looking back at what God has done in my life and smiling. There are things I have done I would change if I could, and other things that amaze me because they have perfectly fallen into place- in spite of me!
Being alive in and of itself is a blessing! I shouldn’t be here. I came into the world after years of “trying.” I came in with a roar, not a whimper, and yet with all the trips my parents took to the hospital for my breathing problems- a whimper would have seemed more appropriate. Weekends overnight in an oxygen tent. The terror of knowing I could die. My father scooping me up off the ground after I collapsed at the Halloween Hallelujah Maze. Blacking out. The doctor’s words, “Zero respiration.” Hearing prayers being said over me. Jesus made it clear I was supposed to be here because there were plenty of times He could have taken me. Yet today I still struggle with trusting Him. It is foolish, I know. I want to trust and yet I find I fear in a way that is beyond healthy respect. I want to love Him more. More than anything I want love of God to exemplify the second 40 years of my life.
Here’s my 40@ 40
5 Life Mottos People are more important than things “I’m getting an Excedrin.” (It’s the “duct tape” for whatever ails me!) Do everything without complaining We can spray paint it Stop fighting, keep pointing to Jesus
5 Things I Can’t Believe I get to play great music for a living How many times God has saved my life How fun it is to have a daughter who looks like me and loves music like me I had the opportunity to visit an international trafficking rescue home and hug the director with AIDS I now like to exercise 5 Things I Want To be more content To pursue relationships more freely and deeply To be a faster reader To stop being afraid to fail To be able to run
5 Random Opinions Sushi is expensive, stinky slime Beach, not mountains All books should all be under 200 pages The world would be a better place with more boy bands Gluten-free cooking is hard, long and boring (I WANT a chef!)
5 Things I Wish I learned earlier (and am still learning) Christians will fail you; you will fail them… and that’s okay. People around me are responsible for their own happiness Boredom does not mean lack of things to do Being “good” doesn’t mean you’ll have an easy life (or vice versa) How to get out of the “Christian bubble” and into the world
5 Things I Dream of… Getting my manuscript published Having actual “abs” again Restoring a Victorian home and making it a B&B Becoming the “Delilah” of Christian radio (taking requests/stories and weaving in inspiring songs) Leading someone to The Lord and watching them live passionately for Him
5 Things I Love About my Family Lindsey is my compassionate spirit who is quiet but doesn’t miss a thing. We share a love of music. Micah is my talkative creative type who asks good questions. Drew is my loving and loyal husband. He pushes me to believe I can do things I wouldn’t do without his strength and encouragement. He is good for me! My mom has always loved me- drama and all. I know she prays fervently for me. She has helped shape/strengthen my faith more than any other person in my life. My dad shows me what it means to care for community. He is loyal to his town and small business clients. He also knows how to kick back and have- and be- fun!
5 Things I Would tell My 16 year-old self Grades are not the most important thing Wait until college to date Have fun Be strong in your faith, but loving and humble Study God’s grace; give yourself grace